Monday, August 13, 2012

You know your are mom (part 3)

Per the readers request I think this will be an on going posting...I aim to please :)

You know your a parent if...

You have ever done a "sniff" test to determine what kind of job has been done in the diaper

You know that babies only poop in clean, dry diapers

You have cut a grape into fours out of fear of choking your tiny human to death

You ask permission before cutting, peeling or dissecting of any kind of a snack for a toddler

You know that if you don't ask permission they are going to say they wanted said snack in the opposite form of which you hand it to them

You have ever ate part of that snack off the floor because you haven't had time to make yourself anything

You have had on that shirt since yesterday or maybe the day before...who the hell knows

You understand the difference in crying and whining

You have ever played hide and seek just for a minute of quiet time

You have text your spouse while they are home because its never quiet enough to tell them anything anymore

You have felt inferior around mothers at the park that remembered to bring band aids and baby wipes

You have felt superior to mothers when your child does a basic human function first (sit up, walk, talk, potty)...even if her child does the same thing later that same day.

You really know that it's not a sign that your a doing a better job but you feel proud anyway

You have slept on random pieces of furniture of your house because its the only place not wet or already taken

You have cursed the floor, phone, dog, or any other object that makes any type of sound during nap time

You have nearly dislocated a shoulder trying to reach in the back seat while driving to hand a screaming child a paci, bottle, sippy or anything else not worth risking your life for

You have wondered after taking 3 hours to get ready and an hour to load in the car if you really need groceries after all

You are reading this post and have said yes to at least 5 statements :)

Have a great week crazies!!!

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